...so Autumn and I load up the van with what very well may be the last of the dump-worthy material here at The Shack and head off to the dump, and the majority of this load is metal, so the first place we go to at the dump is the metal dumping area, and we procede to empty the van, and in the process of heaping our scrap onto the pile I notice a four foot alluminum step ladder in the pile and, now, of all the ladders in the Ladder Kingdom, the four-footer is the one that has eluded me the most, I never having owned one, and let me tell you the four-footer one handy ladder, so, being the scrounger that I am, I waded into the pile and examined it, and it was a perfectly functional, sound, magnificent specimen so, of course, I commenced to hike out of the pile and bring the ladder to the van, because I had thence claimed it for my own, and long about this time an equipment operator sitting atop a large front-end loader sidled up behind me and caught my eye and flatly stated, "There is no salvaging allowed at the dump." and, without skipping a beat and off the top of my head, I said, "I just threw this ladder out and am having second thoughts about whether I want to junk it or not." so he ponders this for a moment, sensing a fib, and then says, "Well, it looks like it was pretty far into the pile for having just been thrown out." and I shrugged and said nothing, and he says, "Well," he says, "I guess I'll let it go this time."
Winner...me.
And so it came to pass, (it was brought to my attention), that, in one fell swoop I was able to commit not one, but two of the Deadly Sins and break two of the Ten Commandments, as I was quite Proud of my ability to Lie for that which I had Lusted and then Stolen..
Does that make me a bad man? Am I bad? Did I do wrong?
Winner...me.
And so it came to pass, (it was brought to my attention), that, in one fell swoop I was able to commit not one, but two of the Deadly Sins and break two of the Ten Commandments, as I was quite Proud of my ability to Lie for that which I had Lusted and then Stolen..
Does that make me a bad man? Am I bad? Did I do wrong?
Is God mad at me?
Will my soul rot in the Eternal Damnation of Hell?
...I think not.
(p.s....I Covet my new ladder!...)
...I think not.
(p.s....I Covet my new ladder!...)
4 comments:
Lucky Man! The four footer is the creme of the crop. I just recently bought my second four footer, first being the almighty WOOD ladder that has served me well and still does because I tighten my ladders as they grow old. Then on a simple trip to Lowes there was a special on four foot FIBERGLASS ladders at a mere 22 dollars.......I snatched without hardly a breath. Not as light as the alluminum but still lighter than wood. At our age, lightness matters huh, Phfrankie?
I need one of those to replace the swiveling bar chair with the two boxes stacked on them that I usually use as a ladder. No...I haven't broken THAT many bones. Evel Kneival is still ahead of me in that category...
Stealing bad, lying bad, saving a perfectly good ladder from the dump good :)
where you come from!
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